When you just need to run alone

It had been a busy week and my brain was about to burst;  our household is currently a bit like a pressure cooker – teenager doing AS exams, husband very busy at work, I’m busy at work, travelling more than usual and waiting for hospital tests that I have been really worried about.

Sunday morning, the sun was shining and I decided to be selfish!  I said I was going for a run, I would be out for at least an hour and wanted to go on my own.  I did feel bad about this because I haven’t seen a huge amount of my husband in the last week, but I knew that I really needed to do this for me.  I’d been in a foul mood on Friday night, Saturday night was just so exhausted I fell asleep on the sofa…  I needed to sort this out for everyone’s sake!


I headed out the door without much of a plan, but quickly decided to do one of the few circular routes I have nearby.  I knew that it was just over 7 miles and thought that I’d be able to do that if I took it steady.  Music on, off I went.  A mile and a half later I was in the next village and bumped into a running friend who was just finishing her run – it is lovely to be able to speak to others, and it is still a novelty to me that people are happy to stop and speak to me.  I did admit that I was out for a run on my own to try and sort out the mess that was my head… (and actually, just admitting it to someone is a HUGE step for me).

The route is all road, but takes me through some gorgeous countryside.  I stopped to take a pic as I was on the bridge over the canal and took a moment to realise the beauty of my surroundings.  I spent a little time watching a kestrel that was hovering over the verge – I tried to get a pic but couldn’t.  Just to be out, in the quiet, not being bombarded with questions, requests, emails, skypes, what’s apps, phone calls…..  was just what I needed.


7.5 miles later I returned home, in a far better mental place than when I’d set off.  It just tells me that I’m right to sometimes put myself first, and that I need to take time for me occasionally.

I’m pleased to say that the scan that I was going to hospital for was completely clear – a huge relief!  The exams will be over soon, and the rest we just need to deal with.



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